Tuesday, January 12, 2010

How Old Is Grandpa?

I bought my first car in 1968 for $30, a 1954 Cadillac Coupe de Ville 2 door hardtop! This was one beautiful car from a bygone era when cars had class, style and prominence, a time we will never see again in the American car industry! My Dad helped me to do a “head-job” on only one side of the OHV V-8 engine for less than $15; I bought four retread tires for $48, and it was ready to go! My high school buddies called it the Sherman Tank which we used to go across town to the other high school to play tennis! Here in Italy they import such a car to use as a type of limousine for newly weds! After four years I sold my Cadillac for $30. Two weeks later I found my poor Cadillac sunk into the sands of the Mojave desert striped of it’s doors; the crazy guy to whom I sold it thought he could convert such a heavy car into a dune-buggy!





Most of us consider ourselves young even if we are getting up there in years. This year (2010) I will finish 59 years of life. It is utterly astounding, or should I say, scary, what has happened in such a short time!

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How Old Is Grandpa?

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events. The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and things in general.

The Grandfather replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill. There were no credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens. There was no television in our house; penicillin, polio shots, air conditioners and frozen foods were some kind of new inventions.

Man had not invented:
pantyhose, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air; man hadn't yet walked on the moon.

Your Grandmother and I got married first, . . . Then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, "Sir". And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir." We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy. Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense. We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.

We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent. Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins. Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started. Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends - not purchasing condominiums.




We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings. We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey. If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk. The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam. Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee was unheard of. We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards. You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, . . .. But who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day "grass" was mowed, "coke" was a cold drink, "pot" was something your mother cooked in and "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby. "Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office, "chip" meant a piece of wood, "hardware" was found in a hardware store and "software" wasn't even a word.

And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap...

And how old do you think I am? I bet you have this old man in mind... you are in for a shock!

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time...




Are you ready?

This man would only have to be 59 years old!

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